Fully Self-actualized

At age 16 I attended a school in Boulder, Colorado for high-school dropouts. One of my fellow students was the son of Vivian Mercier, a scholar of Samuel Beckett's work, esp the play Waiting For Godot.

My first read was that year and while on LSD. I was struck by Estragon's reply to Vladimir when asked how was the carrot. Estragon's reply was, "It's a carrot." While many critics cite this exchange as Beckett's allusion to homosexuality, I interpreted it as a Zen-like observation that a carrot is NOT a pseudo penis, but simply a carrot. (I recall a similar analogy when someone commented about a cigar. The smoker replied by saying it wasn't a standin for a "dick," at all, but, in fact, a fine cigar.)

I adopted the phrase and later, when I became an art dealer, it morphed into the carrot on a stick - when dangled in front of their face -  used to motivate mules. Discarding the stick, I saw the carrot as an ineffable ideal that inspired me to leap from my bed each morning, eager to extol and expound on the beauties of the art I had for sale. The concept sustains me to this day.

The mule no longer plays a role and I've returned to the carrot itself, in the ether of a starry void. Michelle Cook's depiction completes Phoebe's exterior embellishments.

I Can't Go on; I'll Go On

72 hours is my limit. Beyond that and reality gets twisted; things turn ugly. Tomorrow we'll have been here, in ABQ, a week. 

I recently read about a book: When Breathe Becomes Air in which the author cites a line from Samuel Beckett's The Unnamable; it's the title of this post. I first read Waiting for Godot at age 16...on acid. As it did then, it inspires guffaws, even when things seem too much. When Joe Pesce and Tricklock Theater performed it back in '82 (?) I laughed so hard I fell off my chair. I tho't it odd that the rest of the audience wasn't laughing.

I have several copies of Waiting For Godot, the library has the book about breathing. I have yet to read The Unnamable.There're 47 holds on 29 copies on the breath book and as of a few minutes ago there are 4,508 reviews on Amazon. I was impressed by how well-written the one-star reviews, comprising 1%, are. And after reading a few I decided not to enter the "hold" queue.

The trips, the driving ones, have themes. The last one was titled Existential Dilemma. It characterized the year. My (calling) card and the blog featured a picture of me, shirtless, tits nearly dragging the ground (teats give milk; tits don't.), struggling to open a beer at 9:00 in the morning. I don't usually "drink" that early, but this was a special occasion and I was attempting to rise to it.

Death has been in the forefront for many of us these recent years. Sometimes I wonder how you...anyone, can go on. 



Serendipitously, I ran across this...

A Hopi Prophecy  (This could be a good time!)



...and went back and found this: 
http://squishytulips.blogspot.com/2015/12/meditative-joyful-magnanimous.html


Both convey that joie de vivre. I include 'em here for future reference. Unlike some folks who write for their readers, this is my way of keeping track of where I was when and what happened. But perhaps the above links'll resonate with you too.



Thanks to RPM Automotive, Phoebe, my '96 Geo Tracker, now runs like a Swiss watch. And thanks to Koenig's Metalmorphosis she'll soon have a new chapeau (roof rack). Estimated date of departure is 10/13. In the meantime Smith is plotting tricks.

I have, for many years, made attempts at the accordion. Here's one from the oughts...you know -- ought one, ought two, ought seven.

The video was crafted by none other than Ms. Michelle D. Cook, cat-wrangler extraordinaire. I'm playing an expensive -- $40.00 -- toy that died an untimely death when it was put in storage. Heat melted the bees wax that held the reeds in place.

It was in Port Orford, Oregon the other day that I was inspired --- you know who you are -- to once again search for an instrument. Smith and I drove to Jemez Springs to look at one seen on Craigslist. The Fall colors are just getting going and the afternoon light gave truth to the phrase Land of Enchantment. If you're touring on highway 4 you might enjoy the side trip on 485 to The Tunnels. The accordion was too big.